Re-Invention

In my formative years, I had this vision for the person I was going to become in my life.  Outside of job descriptions, I knew who I wanted to be and what it was going take to get me there.  Although as I look in the mirror, the reflection is not that of the person I envisioned.


Sometimes I don't recognize the reflection looking back at me. 


Right now I don't.


And for good reason, I find myself readjusting, rethinking, redoing, reorganizing, and remodeling my life. 


However, there was a time when this "reinvention of self" occurred for different reasons.  I used to try to be a person that I thought others wanted me to be: friends, boyfriends, potential love interests, family. I was striving to become the version of myself that they wanted me to be.  And in all of that I lost sight of who I was of who I am. 


I know I'm not perfect. I know that sometimes I'm a bit haphazard in my ways. I own those parts of me. I am the most perfect Rosisella because that is all I can be. Can I strive to be better?  Is there a flaw in the notion that I must be fixed?  Does that mean that I am broken?  The mind is a powerful tool.  It can create a world and live it in.  Then you suddenly attract people with the ideas that prove what you always thought to be true.  I feel like I question so much when really I just need to question the assumption that I am lacking.  Focusing long enough on erroneous assumptions will eventually lead to their confirmation.  


Right now, I do need to make some positive changes in my life.  And I am on the way of making those things come to fruition.


Every day is a new start.  Sometimes I don't always know where I'm going, but the best place to start is usually the beginning.


I love everyone.